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Tuesday, August 16, 2022
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National Rifle Association

The Pastiche Post

Ted Cruz: “We Can’t Do Something About Gun Violence Until We’re Done Doing Nothing”

James Schlarmann -
Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-TX) doesn't want to do anything about gun violence until the country is done doing nothing about it first.
The Pastiche Post

NRA Reminds Americans They Don’t Give a Fuck How Many of Their Friends and Family Get Shot

James Schlarmann -
For most of 2020, Americans were dealing with a global covid-19 pandemic outbreak, and as such the number of mass shootings in this country...
The Pastiche Post

NRA Backs Trump’s Proposed ‘Second Amendment Cure’ for Coronavirus

James Schlarmann -
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- The National Rifle Association has released a statement supporting an unorthodox idea floated by President Donald J. Trump's. Reportedly, last night,...
The Pastiche Post

North Challenges LaPierre to AR-15 Duel for Control of NRA

James Schlarmann -
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- There's a power struggle developing at the National Rifle Association, and one of the men at the center of it has...
The Pastiche Post

NRA Spokesterrorist Suggests Schools Relocate To Colt, Bushmaster Factories

James Schlarmann -
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- Dana Loesch, the NRA's official spokesterrorist, recently told a group of gun enthusiasts that she thinks the Parkland, Florida school shooting...
The Pastiche Post

NRA Executive Just Two More School Shootings From Being Able To Afford Fourth Vacation Home

James Schlarmann -
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- Today, during a board meeting of the executives of the National Rifle Association, board member Tim Timberlake said that thanks to the...
The Pastiche Post

Why Won’t You Just Let Me Stockpile Arms Against You, People Who Think Like You, Your Children, And Our Government, Libtards?

Bill Dickerdolldildo -
The following is an op-ed by Bill Dickerdolldildo, founder of Totes Biased America, leading voice in right-wing Facebook commentary. The views and expressed herein...
The Pastiche Post

President Trump Rushes Headlong Into White House Screening Of “Die Hard” And Runs Out Screaming 10 Minutes Later

James Schlarmann -
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Today, President Donald Trump was witnessed by several people in his administration bravely charging into a screening room that was showing...
The Pastiche Post

Dana Loesch Not Sure She Wants To Be The NRA’s Spokesterrorist Anymore

James Schlarmann -
FAIRFAX, VIRGINIA -- Many Americans might have gotten the sense in the last fifteen years or so that weekly, if not daily, incidents of...
The Pastiche Post

Adults Demand Teenagers Stop Effectively Demonstrating How Much They Failed To Protect Their Kids

James Schlarmann -
GREEN GLEN, FLORIDA -- A group of concerned adults was seen chastising a group of teenagers of equal size this weekend, in a small...
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