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Obama Suing President Trump For Libel

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In court documents filed today, former President Barack Obama is suing current Kinda President Donald Trump for libel, stemming from the...

Mr. Ed And Seabiscuit Deny President Trump Is A Stable Genius

In a joint press release, Mr. Ed, and Seabiscuit -- both Equine Americans -- seemingly refuted statements made in tweets from President Donald Trump. In...

Hillary Clinton Will Read The Audiobook Version Of “Fire and Fury”

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- Alinsky Talent Agency announced this morning that one of their stable of stars has been tapped to record the...

Putin Dictates Trump’s New Year’s Resolutions To Him

MOSCOW, RUSSIA -- Today, Russian President Vladimir Putin made a phone call to Secondary American President Donald Trump and dictated a list of resolutions...

Trump Declares South Electoral College Winners Of Civil War

MAR-A-LAGO, FLORIDA -- Just hours after triumphantly declaring a victory in the War on Christmas, President Donald Trump gave a late Christmas gift to...

Donald Trump Jr. To Have Breakthrough Plastic Surgery For His ‘Chronic Jizz Face’

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- The president's son will be undergoing a radical, experimental new plastic surgery procedure, and the hope is that when...

Keurig Releases Roy Moore Model That Uses 14-Year Old Covfefe Pods

READING, MASSACHUSETTS -- In the face of a conservative boycott of their products, Keurig has announced a new product line they hope will win...

Jeff Sessions Reveals Himself As Member Of The Keebler Klux Klan

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The nation's capital is abuzz with rampant rumor and speculation after an explosive new email leaked from somewhere within the Department...

Disney Apologizes For Using His Soul To Sculpt Animatronic Trump In Hall of Presidents

ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA -- The Walt Disney Company has issued an official apology to the White House this morning, saying they are "forever sorry" for...

Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Donald Trump's Russian headaches will not go away. For over a year, allegations of connections between Russia and his campaign, now...

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