Tag: comedian

Disney Assures Visitors They Can Still Hurl Racist Insults at Employees While Riding Updated Splash Mountain

ANALSLIME, CALIFORNIA — This week, Disney became the latest corporation to reconcile its problematic ...

Police Union Suggests Banning Camera Phones Would Eliminate Brutality and Excessive Force

LA VALLE DE PUERCA, CALIFORNIA — The United National Fraternity of Law Enforcement, one ...

Alphabet Announces New Porn-Only Web Browser Called “Google Cream”

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA — For years now, millions of users have surfed websites ...

Bill Gates Announces Windows COVID-19 Operating System

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON — In just a couple of weeks, Microsoft will launch its newest ...

Man Dumbfounded That Clothes Left Next to Hamper Are Still Washed and Folded

COLORADO SPRINGS, COLORADO — A Colorado man has reported miraculous laundry patterns in his ...

World Shocked to Discover Billionaire Just Entitled Sociopath Asshole

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA — Billionaire and Likely Cartoon Villain Elon Musk wanted his ...

Local Militia Group Preparing to Liberate Chick-Fil-A Dining Room From Coronavirus Lockdown

SISTER BANGER, KENTUCKY — They don’t know exactly when, but the members of Kentucky’s ...

Oprah Winfrey School of Medicine Revokes Degrees Given to Dr. Phil and Dr. Oz

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS — One of the nation’s leading reality-TV medical schools has decided to ...

Local Idiots Demand Right to Die for Retail Commerce

DUMBERG, OHIO — The village idiots of a town in Ohio stormed their town’s ...

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