Sunday, February 28, 2021

Michele Bachmann Sees Her Own ‘Undeniable Genius’ in Lauren Boebert

WASHINGTON, D.C. — During her time in the U.S House of Representatives, Republican Michele Bachmann made quite the reputation for herself. Bachmann’s penchant for striding into the national spotlight and saying things most intelligent human beings wouldn’t think of, let alone saying pushed her far enough into the conservative lexicon that she was able to mount a presidential bid of her own in 2012, ultimately bowing out when now Sen. Mitt Romney cleared the field and faced off against former President Barack Obama.

In a new interview with The Moronic, a new magazine aimed at the roughly 14% of Americans who are pro-Trump and can also read, Bachmann says that there’s a newcomer on the scene in Washington that is giving her quite a lot of deja vu.

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“That Lauren Boebert! Let me just tell you, and I don’t want to sound stuck-up, or full of anything other than the spirit of the lord and racist Breitbart headlines, but,” Bachmann is quoted in the interview, “I see quite a lot of the same undeniable genius in her as I believe everyone saw in me.”

This week, Boebert, a freshman congresswoman from Colorado who ran a very pro-MAGA message, has already made waves. During last week’s failed coup attempt, Boebert was tweeting about the attack in specific detail, potentially thwarting efforts to keep the members of Congress safe during the attack. Then, this week, she made a ruckus and refused to enter through newly installed metal detectors, put in place after President Trump’s failed insurrection at the Rotunda.

“I mean, it takes a real gold medal level of stupidity to be the victim of a domestic terror attack and then the very next week complain about having to go through metal detectors at the very same place the attack took place,” Bachmann explained. “That’s how stupid Lauren is, and I have to tell you, it makes me very excited to be a Republican!  Finally, Sarah Palin and I have women we can invite into our special club for idiotic Republican women!”

Bachmann predicts “great things are in store” for Boebert.

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“I really think you could see her be the first Moronic American president one day,” Bachmann said. “Look, four years ago nobody would have believed a racist, egomaniacal reality TV game show host could be president, and look where we are today! If she doesn’t end up president, maybe she’ll end up hosting a show on OAN with Rudy Giuliani or something else equally as important to the republic!”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

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