Wednesday, July 28, 2021
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Medicine

Dr. Tucker Carlson Still Not Ready to Endorse COVID-19 Vaccine

COVID-19 vaccines have been available for more than six months, and while an initial surge of Americans taking one of the three currently approved...

Fauci Says He’s Never Heard of a Virology Lab in Any Crossfit Gym

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman Congresshorse Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) wants Americans to ignore the advice of Dr. Anthony Fauci and instead listen to her....

Doctors Marvel: Lobotomy Somehow Leaves Man Twice as Smart as Marjorie Taylor Greene

PHARDT'S PEAK, GEORGIA -- Every doctor we interviewed was completely unable to explain how it happened. By all accounts, having half of his brain...

Fauci: It’s ‘Entirely Possible’ Ted Cruz Leaked From a Lab or Trump’s Rectum

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Dr. Anthony Fauci finally laid to rest some questions he's been repeatedly hounded by reporters and Republican members of Congress to...

After Fauci Reminds Americans Condoms Prevent STDs, Pro-MAGA Patriot Diagnosed With Syphilis

"I don't trust a damn word that comes out of notorious Anti-Trumper Dr. Tony Fauci's liar mouth," white nationalist and pro-MAGA super patriot Matthew...

CDC Says Fully Vaccinated Politicians Can Safely Rim Wannabe Autocrats Again

ATLANTA, GEORGIA -- Many Americans are wondering when life can return to some version of normal after they're fully vaccinated against COVID-19. Despite what...

Fauci Warns Rand Paul With or Without a Mask, People Can Still Tell He’s a ‘Twat-Waffle’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- One thing has become increasingly clear over the last year -- Senator Rand Paul (Q-KY) has some deeply-held animosity toward Dr....

Trump Was Disappointed His Vaccine Didn’t Also Cover Windmill Cancer or Bone Spurs

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- During his long-winded open mic set at the 2021 CPAC convention, former President Donald Trump lambasted President Joe Biden for getting...

Scientist Says Boebert Was Created In a Lab With Sarah Palin’s Brain and Wayne LaPierre’s Dick Sweat

Recent GED recipient, former diarrhea inducing BBQ chef, and newly minted, freshman Congresswoman Lauren Boebert loves guns. She ran her campaign on a big...

Alabama Teenager Rushed to Urgent Care With Uncle’s Baby In Her Eye

COU-ROUGE COUSIN SEXE PARISH, ALABAMA -- Doctors and attending staff in the urgent care facility at First United Baptist Methodist Hospital of Lower South...

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