Politics

Steven Seagal Looking Forward To Piss Whores

MOSCOW, RUSSIA — Former alleged actor and martial artist Steven Seagal will be the ...

Emergency Crews Working To Remove Jeff Sessions From Package of E.L. Fudge Cookies

This story was first published on The Political Garbage Chute. WASHINGTON, D.C. — At the ...

Richard Nixon Experiencing Crazy Case Of Deja Vu

LAKE OF FIRE, ETERNITY — From deep within the bowels of Hell, a deep, ...

Trump Says Undocumented Mexicans Coming Here To Take Advantage Of The Homestead Act

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In 1862, President Abraham Lincoln signed into the law the first ...

Trump Says He’ll Have Mexican American Soldiers Pay For His Southern Wall

WASHINGTON, D.C. — During the 2016 presidential campaign, one of now President Trump’s most ...

Mushroom Cloud Assures Americans John Bolton Will Shape Trump’s Foreign Policy In Sane, Rational Direction

FALLOWT FALLS, NEVADA — As President Donald Trump selected hawkish conservative and former Ambassador ...

Trump Tells Mueller FBI Better Not Send Any Democrats To Arrest Him

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump has sent a sternly worded letter to Special ...

Mike Pence Wonders Who He Has To Blow For John Oliver To Write A Book About Him Instead

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Comedian and talk show host John Oliver recently trolled Vice President ...

Betsy DeVos Is Pretty Sure She’s Heard Of This School Thing You Keep Talking About

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Last night, 60 Minutes aired an interview that Leslie Stahl conducted ...