Saturday, September 18, 2021
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Politics

AZ Audit Finds Two Million Ballots Filled Out in Unicorn Blood

LOS MORONOS, ARIZONA -- This morning, Cyber Ninjas announced that their audit of Arizona's 2020 election has turned up what they described as "irrefutable-ish...

Cuomo to Resign and Focus on 2024 Run with Bill Cosby as VP

ALBANY, NEW YORK -- In a surprise development, embattled New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has announced that by the end of the week, he...

Trump Pushed FDA to ‘Just Say Big Macs Make You Skinnier’

With each passing day, the American public finds out a little bit more about the man who spent four years in the Oval Office...

GOP Leadership: Pelosi ‘Bears Responsibility’ for Jan 6th For Not Declaring Trump King

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A handful of House Republicans in leadership positions held a press conference this morning, minutes before the January 6th special select...

McCarthy Selects Q-Anon Shaman and MAGA Bomber for January 6th Committee

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- After several weeks of anticipation, House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (Q-CA) has chosen the people who will represent the Republican caucus...

Gaetz, Greene Move America First Rally to ‘Suitable’ Stables in Riverside

Usually, whenever Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) speaks about California or Californians, she doesn't have a nice thing to say. Often, she pejoratively refers...

Trump Orders McCarthy to Put the Former First Lady on January 6th Commission

BAD MINCER, NEW JERSEY -- This morning, former, one-term, twice forever impeached President Donald J. Trump met with House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy (Q-CA)...

Pro-Life Tennessee Republicans Fighting to Help More Kids Die of Preventable Diseases

NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE -- This week, news outlets reported that Tennessee Republicans did something that some might find rather odd during a global pandemic --...

Boebert Grateful the ‘Gun Amendment is Second,’ Because If It Were Higher She Couldn’t Find It

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Freshman Congresswoman Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) told a group of gun manufacturer lobbyists this week that she "loves guns" and that while...

New Research Suggests Marjorie Taylor Greene is a ‘Sentient Klan Rally’

Dr. Valerie Gilgamesh, Chief Researcher at The National Institute of Looking Into Stuff, held a press conference today and announced that she and her...

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