News

Michael Avenatti’s New Client Says Trump Sexually Assaulted Her In Front of Hundreds at CPAC

NORTH HOLLYWOO, CALIFORNIA — The attorney who represented Stormy Daniels in multiple suits against ...

Trump Regrets Lying About Lying About Telling Michael Cohen to Lie About Him Lying

WASHINGTON, D.C. — When Donald Trump came down from the White House’s presidential residence ...

Barack Obama and The Clintons Sue Breitbart, InfoWars, and Fox News for Defamation

NEW YORK, NEW YORK — In a stunning, unforeseen development, former President Barack Obama ...

McConnell Confident Trump Can Fit His Entire Dick In There

WASHINGTON, D.C. — At a hastily convened press conference this afternoon, Senate Majority Leader ...

President’s Plane Renamed “Air Force Individual-1”

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump’s aircraft has been officially rechristened. “Because Special Counsel ...

Transgender Afghanistan Vet Hopes Trump’s Bone Spurs Aren’t Hurting Him Anymore

STONE HILL, KENTUCKY — Lt. Michael Sabara was born Christina Sabara, and he served ...

Trump Orders Space Force to Build Space Wall

WASHINGTON, D.C. — During a radio interview on WKKK-FM, Donald Trump Jr. accidentally let ...

Obama Offers To Fill-In As President During Government Shutdown

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Citing the fact that he already lives in Washington and is ...

Trump Promises Supporters He’ll Never Die ‘Like That Cuck Bush’

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Despite prior tensions between the Bush family and President Donald Trump, ...

Soldier Deployed At Border Hopes His Kevlar Vest Is Rock-Proof

LOS CHINGADORES DE CULEROS NARANJOS, TEXAS — Since last week, President Donald Trump has ...