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North Korea Gives Ashli Babbit Posthumous Medal

The Democratic Republic of North Korea has issued one of the highest honors it can bestoy on a foreign citizen this week, though it...

Mexico Issues $0.00 Check For Final Wall Payment

This story was first published on Alternatively Facts, and is reprinted below with their expressed, written permission. MEXICO CITY, MEXICO -- When he ran for president...

Mexico Offers to Pay for Trump’s Movers

MEXICO CITY, MEXICO -- The Mexican government has offered to foot the bill for any company hired to move outgoing President Donald Trump's belongings...

Ted Cruz Will Demand Congress Certify He’s a Ball-less Douche With an Ugly Wife

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Before the 2016 presidential race, Sen. Ted Cruz had a wife named Heidi whose looks had never been the subject of...

Over Christmas, Trump’s Kids Asked Him If They Can Strip the White House of Silverware and Copper Wiring

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Outwardly, the President of the United States of America is doing what he's done his whole life -- projecting a reality...

Biden Posts Eviction Notices on White House Doors

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Last week, it was reported by Satirical Facts that the Biden transition team officially served President Donald J. Trump with eviction...

Pence Told Reporters He’s Been ‘Poked By Enough Guys’ Before Not to Be Nervous About Coronavirus Vaccine

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This morning, wearing a short-sleeved, plaid print button-up shirt, outgoing Vice President Mike Pence received a dose of a coronavirus vaccine. Pence...

106 House Republicans Sign Brief With Supreme Court Declaring Trump’s Genitals ‘Tasty and Habit-Forming’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- As the days in both the Trump administration and the Republican Party's even feigned allegiance to democratic institutions wains, one thing...

Ghosts of Christmases Past, Present, Future Confirm McConnell Has No Soul to Save

"Quite frankly, I'd rather take a shot at saving Satan himself," the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come told us at one point during...

Citing Pending Litigation, the Black Knight Refuses to Concede

THE FORESTS OF ENGLAND -- Despite the fact that he is now without arms and legs, the Black Knight has decided to let his...

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