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Eric Trump Pretty Sure He Got a Puppy From Iraq for Christmas From Daddy
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — President Donald Trump’s most intelligent son named Eric was ...
McConnell Promises to Hold Impeachment Trial in Moscow
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said today that “in the interest ...
Jordan, Gohmert, Collins Smugly Confident They’ve Convinced America to Impeach Hunter Biden
WASHINGTON, D.C. — “We did it, guys. We really fuckin’ did it,” Congressman Matt ...
Bill Barr: “Non-Whites Who Don’t Own Land Voting Sets a Dangerous Precedent of Self-Governance”
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Attorney General William Barr said in a radio interview today that ...
Racist, Lying Conman With Tiny Hands, Mushroom Penis, and Bad Spray Tan Who Fantasizes About Boning His Own Daughter Can’t Understand Why Anyone Would Laugh At Him
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — President Trump just doesn’t understand why anyone would ever ...
Gordon Sondland Passed His Bus Driver Exam Just Before Impeachment Hearing
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Sources close to the situation are reporting that, prior to his ...
Clinton Circling Roger Stone’s Court Proceeding Shouting “Gonna Lock Him Up!”
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton and her late model ...
Trump Wants Purple Heart for Getting Ego Bruised by Impeachment
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a closed-door deposition this week, Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman gave ...
Eric and Donald Trump Jr. Are Going to Scare White House Trick-or-Treaters as ‘Pointy-Headed Ghosts’
WASHINGTON, D.C. — This morning the Trump administration announced that First Sons Donald Jr. ...
Ken Starr Sees a ‘Stunning Lack of Blowjobs’ In Impeachment Case Against Trump
WACO, TEXAS — Though he’s now the chancellor of Baylor University, Ken Starr was ...