Tuesday, April 13, 2021
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Arts & Entertainment

Doughy Senator Defends White Supremacist’s Right to Mock Women Who Could Kick Their Asses

Ted Cruz wants to know why military officials would defend their own instead of letting Tucker Carlson bash them.

Pillar of Masculinity and Super Soldier Tucker Carlson Criticizes Female Combat Vets

The world's most alpha of alpha males, Fox News' Tucker Carlson, has some thoughts to share on female combat veterans.

Tucker Carlson Didn’t See any Signs of White Supremacy at Cross Burning

NEW YORK, NEW YORK -- On last night's episode of his Fox News television program, Tucker Carlson told his audience that he "just couldn't...

Biden Says It’s Time To Take Eric’s Finger Paintings Off the White House Fridge

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Joe Biden took office last month, he signed a flurry of executive orders that reversed several such orders signed by...

Gina Carano Identifies As Unemployed

HOLLYWOOB, CALIFORNIA -- Alt-right Nazi sympathizer, former human punching bag, and alleged actress Gina Carano has confirmed in several social media posts that she...

Confused Evangelical Still Can’t Find Anti-Abortion Verses in Bible

CORNHOLE FALLS, IDAHO -- Chad McMichaels is a 36 year old devout, born again Evangelical Christian. As such, Chad believes that abortion should be...

Museum of Holocaust Denial Hires Stephen Miller as New Director

LAKE FUROR, FLORIDA -- When the previous administration left the White House a few days ago, many staffers and aides were still scrambling to...

Boebert and Taylor Greene to Star in OAN’s “Real Housewives of QAnon”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Far-right media outlet OAN has announced that it will begin airing its own alternative reality TV shows, produced for their target...

COVID-19 Forces Jesus to Delay Second Coming

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Concerns about the ongoing COVID-19 outbreak, particularly in the United States' "Bible Belt," have forced Jesus Hubert Christ to...

Jesus Still Doesn’t Know Why Everyone Calls the Day He Was Executed “Good Friday”

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- A visibly annoyed Jesus Hubert Christ, son of Larry "God" Schumway, told a gaggle of heavenly reporters this morning...

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