James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

Jeff Sessions Reveals Himself As Member Of The Keebler Klux Klan

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The nation’s capital is abuzz with rampant rumor and speculation after ...

Trump Preemptively Pardons Himself for Pardoning Himself for Things He Says He Didn’t Do

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump’s Russian headaches will not go away. For over ...

“The Last Jedi” Brings in Historic $23 Squintjillion Opening Weekend Haul

Before its release, many in Tinseltown predicted that the latest installment in the Star Wars franchise ...