James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

Tennessee Pro-Life Republicans Want to Outlaw All Sex

THEOCRACY MOUNTAIN, TENNESSEE — In the state of Tennessee, pro-life forces are growing tired ...

Missouri Dems Propose Classifying Erections That Precede Abortions as Accessories to Murder

TRAPPEDIN, MISSOURI — Democrats in the Missouri State legislature have proposed a new law that ...

Shop-Vac Building New Manufacturing Facilities in Georgia, Alabama, Missouri, Ohio

WILLIAMSPORT, PENNSYLVANIA — Citing a “brand new, previously unforeseen need in the market,” Shop-Vac ...

Local Republican Can’t Wait to Share His Awful Views of Rape, Incest With You

LAKE CHAUVIN, FLORIDA — Lance Westmund is a 52-year-old self-described Born-Again Christian, Republican, gun owner, ...

Pro-MAGA Musician Drops New Country Single and Video: “I F**k The Flag”

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE — A pro-Trump singer/songwriter on the Confederate Records label has ...

MAGA Supporter Visits Germany and Wonders, “Where Are All The Hitler Statues?”

SCHEIßE GESICHT, GERMANY — Jethro Bohiggins, a fairly well-known right-wing podcaster, YouTube content producer, ...

NBC To Put Trump Trigger Warning Before Every Episode Of Saturday Night Live

NEW YORK, NEW YORK — Since becoming President, Donald Trump has tweeted his displeasure ...