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Monthly Archives: November, 2021

Four Foot Tall Man Famous for Convincing People to Eat Bugs Confirms Deep State is “100% Real”

FUCKSBERG, TEXAS -- A short man, barely four feet tall, told his massive podcast audience this week that the so-called Deep State, referred to...

Trump Jr. Texted Trump on January 6th Asking If His Dad Loves Him But Never Got a Response

Despite still resisting his congressional subpoena, former White House Chief of Staff Mark Meadows did hand over reams of documents, emails, and text messages...

Historians Unearth Benedict Arnold’s PowerPoint Presentation

As it turns out, America's most infamous traitors perhaps might have one rather surprising thing in common -- their preferred presentation software. "Obviously we know...

Listerine Contradicts Ron Johnson, Says It’s Intended for Recovering Alcoholics Sneaking Booze

Mouthwash maker Listerine is not useful in fighting COVID-19, the company said in a statement pushing back against sitting U.S. Senator Ron Johnson (Q-WI)....

Trump Has a Title for His Presidential Memoir and Coloring Book

It took him over a year since he lost the election, and almost a year since he lost the ensuing insurrection, but former, one...

Cruz Cautions Harris Against Using Wired Headphones While Wearing a Tan Suit

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, Politico dropped what can only be fairly described as the most important, consequential, must-read story of the Biden administration thus far. The...

Condolences Overwhelmed Rep. Thomas Massie’s Office After He Publicized His Micro-Penis

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rep. Thomas Massie (Q-KY) is being cheered by his colleagues on both sides of the aisle, a rare feat these days....

God Sends Venmo Request for $600,000 to Joel Osteen

KINGDOM OF HEAVEN, ETERNITY -- Larry "God" Schumway, President and CEO of Holy Trinity, Inc., sent a Venmo request to Joel Osteen this morning,...

Michigan High School Hosts America’s Most Recent Mass Second Amendment Demonstration

OXFORD, MICHIGAN -- Three students are dead, and six others have been injured in America's latest Second Amendment Demonstration. Authorities say the 15-year-old organizer...

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