Every Trump Hotel Closing For Business For One Day To Teach Employees How To Be Racist

NEW YORK, NEW YORK — The Trump Organization has announced that on May 7th, 2018 they will shut down every single Trump Hotel in the world for one day in order to conduct training seminars on racism.

“La Trumpa Nostra was inspired by the announcement that Starbucks will be closing over 8,000 stores in the country to teach their employees some anti-racial bias seminars,” Donald Trump Jr. announced in a conference call with investors this morning. “But, my dear comrades, I think you’ll find our seminars are much more betterer because instead of being cucks, we’re teaching our employees the proper ways to be racist.”


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Trump Jr. indicated that the company will “take a page out of [his father’s] book” during the seminars, and teach hotel staff how to deny people of color a room for any length of time.

“In 1973, Daddy was sued by the Justice Department because he and Grand Wizard Daddy wouldn’t rent their apartments in New York to the blacks,” Junior said. “Of course, back then, we job creators could call them other words without offending the super-PC libtard cuck police. But anyway, the point is that back in the day Daddy already had figured out the best way to handle the racism problem — segregation.”

Donald Jr. said that while he and his family are “the least racist First Family since President Jefferson Davis’ term,” they do consider themselves to be “race realists.”

“All that means of course is that we acknowledge the differences between the races. That’s why we tweet out debunked, racist crime stats and stuff,” Junior said. “Because we Trump know, deep down, that the races will never get along. But that doesn’t mean we want slavery to come back! That’s fake news!”

Mr. Trump Jr. explained that he and his family had a “different idea” for African Americans instead.

“Just give them, like, their own separate but equal society, has anyone come up with that yet? We think that has a nice ring to it,” Trump Jr. said. “That’s why it makes sense and is not racist at all to not let them into our hotels, except as shoe shine boys and bellhops, of course.”

President Trump praised his family’s business decision in an Oval Office discussion later in the day.

“That Don Jr., I couldn’t be prouder,” Trump said. “He’s a real rag cut from the old hood, if you know what I mean.”

This story is developing.

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